D2 will not be DISTRACTED by your cocky DEMEANOR today, DAY DREAMER…aka ABC08!Â
That’s right, today is race DAY in Phoenix. And, like I DO every race DAY, I make my list of racing DELEGATES that I feel have the DRIVE to take me into Victory Lane! Week after week, my DEAR friend tries to DISTRACT me in my quest of DEFENDING my championship. Yes, twice…. he has DIVERTED my attention from the subject at hand and DEALT me a punch! Guess what, ain’t happening… not toDay! I am on the DEFENSE after a DEVASTATING finish last week!
D2 will not be DISTURBED this DAY… Quite the contrary! I am DESTROYING the DARK cloud that hovered above me, and am ready for the DUEL!
For you, GorDon Rules, I am making sure I post the picks for tonight’s race. I apologize that my “Flying Pigs” post of last week DISAPPEARED, and you missed what I thought was a line up to put ABC in the DOGHOUSE! In any event, here is the DOWNRIGHT DEVILISH roster that will put me, the DELICIOUS one back in the DRIVER’S seat!!! Grab a DOUGHNUT, your favorite DRINK and enjoy!
D2′s DISTINGUISHED DRIVERSÂ Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â ABC’s Crash Test DUMMIES
Tony Stewart                                                   Jeffrey Jack Pink Panties Gordon
Mark Martin                                                      Dale, Jr. (this is DA Man!)
Jeff Burton                                                       Jimmie Jacked Fuel Line Johnson
DENNY Hamlin                                                   Cousin Carl Edwards
Kevin Harvick                                                     Kurt Wants Busch
Clint Bowyer                                                      Greg Wiffle Ball Biffle
As you see, ABC keeps taking my boy, DALE, Jr, and it is really ticking me off…so, this week after he took DALE, I took his boi, DENNY! Ha Ha, CiCi is going DOWN tonight, DUMBBELL style!!
So, you may as well head for the DUGOUT, ABC… sit back and watch D2 DESTROY you and your little C**T, CiCi! Keep DILLYDALLYING… and DAYDREAMING… your DAYS of being The Champ are about to be DISSOLVED! After tonight, the record will be 5-2, with the DELICIOUS, DECADENT, DELECTABLE, DRENCHING, unDENIABLE, unDISCOUNTED, inDEPENDENT, DIVIDEND collecting, DRIPPING, DOLCE Vita wearing DOLL, D2′d!
Yes, DUKE DUPED me at the DANCE but, your Dummies against my DISTINGUISHED DRIVERS DON’T stand a DEVIL’S chance in the DESERT! I also suggest a DRASTIC change in your DIET and DINING requests… all of that CHEESE, CHIMYCHANGA, CHOCOLATE CAKE, COORS, CHILI and CORN on the COB, will only put COTTAGE CHEESE on your ass and thighs!! Try a CUKE, CAULIFLOWER, CHEERIOS, or CANTELOPE… much better for your DIGESTIVE tract…LOL!
Get ready for the DEBAUCHERY… a cream filled DESSERT, your DESIRE? Or perhaps, the licking of a sweet DERRIERE? D2 DECIDES who DEALS the next hand… so, DOWN, boi!!! DEEPER… DON’T stop until this DAME DEEMS you are DONE! DREDGE up the DIAMONDS and buttons, LOL… that are DEEP within this DIVA’S DWELLING!Â
I DIGRESS… but, I am sure you are DREADING tonight when the “DOUBLE D” DROWNS you in a pool of DOWNY! You might be DISGUSTINGLY soft and unable to DISTEND or report for DUTY but, you will smell good!Â
Where oh where do I come up with this silliness, I ask?
Okay folks… I am taking tonight off! I know, I usually take Sunday’s off but, tonight’s the night! I may or may not be back on the phones tomorrow… maybe Monday! But, I hope you all have a DAMN good weekend, and I will be talking with you soon!!!
Signed,
The DICHOTOMYÂ *got that CiCi?*
    Of course, CHOCOLATE CAKE!!